Pretty much true…. ( says another “2am person”)
from everything that I have been through, or witnessed, all I can say is that you are more than right when talking about embracing our “darker” side… In fact ( I do not want to bore everyone with a bunch of details on how and why) — if anyone is afraid, or ashamed of it — embracing it is the only way to get rid of it…
You are right to state that embracing is not the same as acting out- in fact, embracing our darker side is a great way to stop us from acting out of our darker impulses… for, once we embrace them, we start understanding them, knowing them, realizing how much they influence our daily lives and, most importantly, only once we have embraced those instincts, we are fully able to control them. Whereas, if we try to ignore them, push them down, or pretend they do not exist.. sooner or later that side of us will come out- and all of the sudden people will start asking “what happened to … he/she was such a good person” … He/she was a good person- but he/she tried to ignore the dark side we all have, and it exploded in their face- as well as the faces of everyone else that was present when the Shit hit the fan.
Just look at the catholic church ( I know some people might get offended by this- sorry, it is just my opinion) — priests going against all human instincts and, agreeing to live in celibacy… I do not know how many catholic priests anyone ever spoke with sincerely, but the story is always the same… During the first few years, celibacy, since it is voluntary, doesn't seem so difficult. but, the more time passes, the more difficult it gets to fight what, they believe, to be “sinful” or “Impure” thoughts and desires… until, after a decade or so , the one thing they were denying themselves, doesn’t come out in full force, creating a mess all around…
Thee is an endless number of examples of people who tried to fight a part of their ( our) nature… and it never went well… FOr, at the end of the day, none of us can escape, on the long run, whatever it is that we are…
And, since we all have a “darker” side, one way or another… ignoring it, fighting it, or refusing to admit we have it never works — OK, it does for a while, but teh results are horrible-
what we should do… is look deep inside, dig out the darkest, most evil, most horrible thoughts, ideas and impulses we have.. take a good look and embrace them as an integral part of not only who we are, but also of who are we going to be — then we can figure out where they come from, what are they asking us to do, and what triggers them… then, and only then, are we able to avoid acting out on these impulses- for, if nothing else- how can we fight something that we do not understand? And, if we do not accept and understand something that is a part of our being- we will never understand ourselves either